Insanely unusual painting, “Her emotional metamorphosis revealed.” Why I made it!

Struggling with my own emotions for years has always had me wondering how emotions change people over the long term. I’ve seen so many people change after the loss of a loved one in various ways. Death is obviously the one people think of the most when it comes to loss, but what about people growing up and moving on or breakup’s or divorce? These are forms of loss for many of us as well and they change us. I’m bringing up loss because when I think of “Emotions” this is the one area that most people understand as being “very emotional.” There is this struggle to not change after losing someone, the more I think about that I realize it’s impossible. People “reach inside you and take a hold of you” and that’s just a fact. When that person leaves “you don’t get to hold onto the part of you they have.” That piece now belongs to them and there isn’t anything you, me, or anyone else can do to change this. Anger, bitterness, jealousy, melancholy, pleasure, pain, and everything else are emotions we are are familiar with and we try to lock many of them away. There are correct times to feel all of these emotions!

Her emotional metamorphosis revealed a painting by Rosco "Carrico" Crooke

“Her emotional metamorphosis revealed”
how emotions change us over time has always been a study and obsession of mine. This piece is an exploration and demonstration of what an emotional metamorphosis really looks like on several different levels.

I struggle with how people say,”don’t let that bother you, don’t worry about that, don’t let that get you down.” It’s as if we are constantly being instructed to “not feel anything!” I want to feel great, happy, joyful, and on top of the world all the time, but that’s not completely possible. There are moments that come along and “take a stand inside you.” If I try to ignore those moments it just ends up much worse later on. Emotions can be misleading very often, but they aren’t evil and they do have “VALUE” in our lives. The reality is that most friends and family just want everyone around them “at peace” and so they use words to try and make that happen. It takes a patient person to simply “walk with someone through there emotional upheaval.” Most people will not do this, they go into their default mode of “just make the person calm.” Sometimes calm and peaceful isn’t what you should feel. When there is loss, injustice, or evil going on our emotions should be quickened up.

I don’t want to explain this piece away, the people that it was meant for will understand the color and design. This much I will say, “Emotions metamorphosis is like a series of chaotic waves moving through us and changing at any moments notice. It’s filled with up’s and down’s, but as far as the shift in energy is concerned, it’s something that can’t be explained with words. So Art is really the only way of seeing it and making any sense of how emotions change and over time they change us.”

P.S. I know this post is very scattered, frazzled, and messy, but that’s part of the idea. Sometimes it’s good to be raw and all over the place for a bit. Not as a style of life, but without moments of heavy unrefined release we can sometimes collapse inside. I don’t want to collapse inside anymore, so now I do what I have to.

Hope you’ve enjoyed the post.
Please feel free to comment and share :)
Thank you so much for your time, Rosco “Carrico” Crooke

“The tree of doubt” painting!

Months ago I could feel doubt trying to creep into my thoughts about my passion for art. Doubt is usually this little voice squeaking in your head that tells you why something isn’t going to work. It has an amazing way of giving you every reason that something is a “bad idea” or “isn’t safe or usually done that way.” It’s with this small quiet voice that doubt has so much power. Finally I knew I needed to create a piece to visualize doubt and be able to move past it. I have always had to visualize things a certain way before I could move on. Now that I’ve embraced painting, it’s allowing me to put that vision into a solid form to be remembered and studied. So I went to work on creating,”The Tree of Doubt.” The East Oregonian Newspaper mentioned this painting recently. Here’s a link to the article

The Tree of Doubt painting Rosco "Carrico" Crooke

Living with doubt is not an option if you want to move forward with anything.

Everything you see in the painting is done for a specific reason. The colors ans shapes I picked for very particular reasons and the shape of the tree is very particular of course to explain the shape do doubt. I don’t like to explain away my pieces by filling in all the blanks and laying out all the info like a technical manual. What I will do is give some information about it and leave the rest to the viewer. Notice that the branches on the tree all aim down and in slightly. That’s because doubt doesn’t let you grow up or out, only down and in to make a person collapse upon themselves. Notice that the base is very small and the roots are hardly there. That’s because doubt keeps you from growing roots as well. You’ll also notice that the tree is tilted slightly as well, almost like the tree is going to fall over. “That’s where doubt always keeps you!!!” Doubt is what leads people to “Exist” and not LIVE! It is merciless in the way it takes a hold of a person and it never wants to surrender. So remember that you can’t make doubt surrender, instead you have to “KILL” doubt! You must resolve yourself to never listening to it and being a destroyer of any doubt that enters your life and the lives of those immediately around you. If you don’t take this approach, a small seed of doubt will start to grow and enter into the Kingdom of your heart and mind again. Doubt, fear, and everything like them are more powerful than we realize. Once I finished this piece I could feel the life in doubt fading away and no longer remaining. I hope that is how anyone that looks at this piece feels and acts after looking at this piece. It might take time to conquer doubt, but it is totally necessary to move forward in life.

tree-of-doubt-painting-black-light-Rosco-Carrico-Crooke

I love making paintings that glow in the dark and that take on a new life under black light.

Thank you all so much for your time :)
Any questions or comments please feel free and encouraged to send them.
Thanks again, Rosco “Carrico” Crooke

Inside the childlike mind!

Painting inside the childlike mind by Rosco Crooke

An idea for a painting that’s been running through my head for a long time now is how a childlike mind must look both physically and spiritually. Knowing how things look really helps me figure things out in many ways. If you can visualize something clearly you might be able to hold onto it or let go of it finally.

While with age comes wisdom, it also brings a calloused mind and sometimes spirit. There is a tendency to think mostly of work, family, friends, and maybe a few fun past times. The room to dream, imagine, and ask questions seems to disappear. A child looks at the sky and wonders how it was painted! An adult looks at it and just enjoys the view or ignores it, so you can see now how the idea of “questioning” is very lost with age. We might think that we’re philosophical about things and trying to make the world a better place and all that. However, the fact remains that in large part we lose the ability to question with a childlike mind. We’re in so far that we can’t step back far enough to ask who and why?

Painting inside the childlike mind by Rosco Crooke

“Inside the childlike mind” An exploration and explanation of what it’s like inside a childlike mind.

I don’t want to be childish, but I do want to keep a childlike spirit and mindset on some things. Losing all the wonder of the world and what God has created seems horrible. It’s like not being able to appreciate the beauty and design that has gone into every single thing there is.  I don’t want to say anything more and confuse the idea for the need of a “childlike mind.”  Hope you enjoyed the post, as always feel free to leave your thoughts and ask any questions you may have :)

Below is a link to a post about creating original paintings that you might enjoy

Original paintings come from somewhere deep inside
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“Melancholy” looks like this?

Melancholy-Me-black-light-painting-Rosco-Crooke

For many years I felt melancholy and didn’t know what to make of it. When you’re in an emotional fog it’s hard to sometimes recognize and deal with it. It wasn’t until I felt much worse that I realized something was really wrong.

Most people think of feeling melancholy as being,”down in the mouth” or “just not feeling up to par.” It’s more than that and it has a way of completely taking over your life. It renders you useless in many ways. It staggers your thoughts and numbs your emotions. The impact it has is so large and so heavy over time, that it shapes your entire life into a “pallet of yellow lukewarm nothingness with dark gray germ-like thoughts running around inside you.”

Painting Melancholy Me by Rosco Crooke

“Melancholy Me” if you’ve ever felt Melancholy you’ll understand this piece very well.

I made this painting, “Melancholy Me” as a choice to get it out of my system forever. It’s a reminder to fight against those thoughts and feelings. And more importantly to do things in life that bring me higher in thought and emotion. I realize more and more all the time that you have to find something you love doing and throw yourself into it from deep inside. That action starts to -root out- the negatives and make way for the positives. It starts a cleansing and healing process to overcome things like depression and melancholy.

Melancholy-Me-black-light-painting-Rosco-Crooke

When you’re in an emotional fog like this it doesn’t go away, even when you’re dreaming it’s affecting you.

I hope enjoyed the post and if you ever have issues with feeling melancholy let me know and I’d be glad to talk to you about it. If you have any comments or suggestions, please feel free to share them.  Take care and God Bless, Rosco “Carrico” Crooke

P.S. Here is a blog post Color Can Change Everything! that you might find interesting and useful when it comes to fighting melancholy feelings or depression.

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New Painting “Bereaved” and why I made it.

Original Painting Bereaved

Since my mother “Donna Claire Crooke” passed away I’ve been feeling and sorting things out in my head. Knowing what to do with all those feelings and thoughts isn’t always easy. So I finally made a painting about my Mom that captured a bit of who she was.  When I first showed it to a couple relatives I think they were very confused and maybe even upset by it.

Painting Bereaved

“Bereaved” a painting all about loss of a loved one. I created this shortly after my Mom died.

The reality is that it captures some things about my mom that others probably never really understood. Over the course of her life she lost several children right after child birth. And while my Mom had two children that lived on and adopted others. She never forgot and never stopped feeling that loss. It was always a part of her. It sounds very morbid and sad, but there is something positive about this. I truly believe that all that loss is what helped shape my mother “Donna Crooke” into such a caring and forgiving person. As you may have read in my previous blog, she always opened up her home to strangers and she always forgave those that hurt her. It was like she had an Open Wound almost all her life and helping others was like a band aid. It’s a reminder to me that while I feel the loss of her and other friends and family that have passed away. Those losses are for a reason and that maybe I’m meant to be a bit of a more Open Wound and therefore more helping and caring. As far as the painting goes,”Look right in the center of it.” That orange outline is my mother looking down and if you look closely you’ll see some blue. That blue is one of the children she lost in child birth. The other blue pieces you see in the painting are her other children that she lost along her path in life. While there is great sadness in this piece, it changes under black light and looks like something different. It almost shows the strength that comes from weakness. Parts of this also glow in the dark and it’s a reminder to me how even when the lights turn off, there is something going on in our minds and lives. Making it black light reactive is to showcase that sometimes you need to shine a light on things to truly see what’s going on.

Original Painting Bereaved

Painting about my Mother Donna Crooke and her loss of children over the course of her life and what it did to her and for her.

Thank you all so much for reading this post. It’s obviously something special to be able to share something about my mother with you. I hope to paint a very happy picture of my mother soon.

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Original paintings come from somewhere deep inside.

Original abstract painting titled Warrior wounded by love by artist Rosco "Carrico" Crooke

If you have pain or joy inside you, share it in a painting.

There is nothing so free as putting paint on a brush and letting it out on a canvas to share. To be able to use color, shape, design, texture, the expectation of light in low to heavy amounts is a great thing. When I can finally relax enough to “just paint” it’s so energizing and emptying all at once. It’s like getting out something that’s horrible and deep inside you. Then when it’s all over, you feel like a weight is off your chest and you can breathe so much better and see things much more clearly again. Then there are times when you have something of great joy inside you that you just want to share with people and express it in a way they can simply feel and or take in. I don’t think anyone can usually really “fully understand” what most paintings are about.

That might sound really silly to some, but even a landscape that looks really simple to some might have a totally different inspiration and meaning to the person that created it. An artist can share thoughts on how and why they created it, but often listening to them you can feel like they are holding something back. Maybe they are painting a nice calm landscape “because they’ve never lived in that kind of setting” or it’s a place that holds a good or bad memory for them. The great thing is when the paint starts to flow a part of you flows right along with it. It’s a release of something that needed out and needed to be put into form.

Warrior wounded by love. A painting about love,pain, and results thereof.

Warrior wounded by love

Art is a heavily debated topic by many and taste comes into play most of the time. People may not use the term “taste,” but that’s exactly what it really is. For me I have started to feel like I’m letting down walls and letting go of fears. The last several years I had become very “conditioned” over time by places I had worked at and or influences in my circle or even just media in all it’s forms. Finding some resources that brought me out of the fog I was in changed everything. God got a hold of me and brought some certain people into my circle. Then He brought a handful of books my way and released many of my fears away. Now that I’m painting abstract and surreal paintings, I’m able to let out and expand who I really am. I said all that so you would know more about me and maybe feel inspired to do some painting yourself. If you sit down and let something come to you that’s deep inside, you can’t go wrong!!! It will be a piece of you shared with anyone you want to share it with. Sometimes sharing is the one thing a person is really missing out on. The more I share the more I grow and the better things are. My name is Rosco “Carrico” Crooke and you’ve just learned more about me and how I think and feel. God Bless

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